 I fell down, and you were there to
pick me up. Not gonna lie, I fell really hard. So hard the ground felt like a bed when I tried to get up, I fell so low the dirt looked like complete blue sky. But you were right there, so far but yet so close you got me up. You got me looking for that redemption, got me looking for that self-worth feeling. Though you started to make my story into your love story. You may have saved me, but you don’t really love me. You’re in love with the moment. you’re in love with the feeling of setting someone free. You may have saved me, but you don’t really love me. So just save me, don’t love me. Don’t get me wrong I’m grateful, but let’s be honest this is not a love story. So just save me, but don’t love me. The skies are just real, but I don’t know if that love you got for me is the real deal or just some product of the moment. Just a written script in your head and not written in stone on your heart. Don’t’ get me wrong I’m grateful, don’t get me wrong you’re the friend I needed. I just need to know if this is really the time for a love story? If this is really the time for me to fall in love with anybody without loving me? You may have saved me, but you don’t really love me. You’re in love with the moment. you’re in love with the feeling of setting someone free. You may have saved me, but you don’t really love me. So just save me, don’t love me. Don’t get me wrong I’m grateful, but let’s be honest this is not a love story. So just save me, but don’t love me. If there is a chance for a love story, let me finish my redemption story. Let me see if I can save myself. Let me see if this what is meant to be, let’s not just rush into things before my story is fully finished. When I’m past the redemption. When I can really love me. Let’s not just be in love with the moment. You may have saved me, but you don’t really love me. You’re in love with the moment. you’re in love with the feeling of setting someone free. You may have saved me, but you don’t really love me. So just save me, don’t love me. Don’t get me wrong I’m grateful, but let’s be honest this is not a love story. So just save me, but don’t love me. Save Me, Don't Love Me... At Least Not Yet...
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 I’ve been dealing with some trials.
Been afraid to walk the fires, been scared to say what’s on my mind. My heart is up in shambles, my mind fighting to stay silent about what my heart really wants. My inner ambitions haunting me like I’m lost in some abandoned Dreamscape. My head is filled with numbers and stars. Flickering on and off trying to stay atop of it all. Trying to take it by day by day. Honestly, it feels like I’m breaking and each piece that chips off is breathtaking. Leaves me in my dreams shaking. Praying for some clarity in my reality. Feels like someone Is reaching for me, but I don’t know which hand to grab. I see so many in my path. I look over to a mirror reflecting someone I barley recognize. The eyes telling everything but lies. Been feeling heavy for the last few days. Haven’t been feeling crazy, honestly it’s only for show. Just to keep my image a float. Days I wonder how long can I really go with this act? When this show will stop selling out? When will I just black out? When will this beat drop, when will I just black out or tap out? Inner Ambitions haunting like I’m lost in some abandoned dreamscape. My head is filled with numbers and stars. My heart is filled with ups and downs. My insecurity reality is pictures of me hiding from the stage. Fears to tears, I know this story all too well. I know this plot all too well. I know myself all too well. I’ve Faced the darkest demons so this seems like nothing to me. I’ve faced the darkest part of me, so this seems like nothing to me. Just sometimes I have to get somethings off of my chest. Put some old demons and insecurities to rest. Just remember just to give my best. Day by day, I’ll make to the 18th street dream, breaking out into my own reality. My head is filled with numbers and stars, getting them in order so I can go far. Remembering to embrace my ambitions, realize my Inner inhibitions. My heart is filled ups and downs, putting this off till another entry, just not ready to face this side of me yet, but yet each piece that breaks off is just revealing the new layer of my inner me, a new side of me. A closer to finding that one thing my heart is really looking for. Off My Chest, in my Dreamscape.... |
Author & PodcasterLive Life With Everything Archives
August 2020
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